Neighbors...Some Of Them Just Suck

Many of you have read about how I strive to be a good neighbor. I overlook many things that some of my neighbors do that really annoy me. I will rarely say a word as I am sure there are things that we have done that have bothered them at times. Nothing big, I hope, but I know that we all have our little quirks that annoy some of those around us.

I have lived in my current place of residence for over four years. It happens to be an apartment complex. I have always had great neighbors here, and have loved my life here. Can you tell where this is going? Yep! You guessed it! I had a psycho neighbor move in right below me. Should I start at the beginning?

She has lived here for about a year I think. The week she moved in started out rough so I have selectively tried not to remember it. The first week she was here she came up and screamed at us because my son and his friend were making noise and scaring her son, who didn't look scared, or even as if he had been crying. Not only that, but I was in the apartment with my son and his friend and I couldn't even hear them making any noise. They were watching a movie. Now, they may have been walking back and forth from the fridge, as boys as prone to doing, but it wasn't as if they were running and jumping and screaming at the top of their lungs. With her right in front of me I scolded the boys, told them not to leave the couch, and then looked at her and said, "next time, try asking first. Screaming at me won't get you anywhere. The next time you scream at me I will slam the door in your face." I then quietly shut the door.

Two days later, my son was at his father's and the neighbor boy was paying in the parking lot we a soft rubber ball. The kind we used in school when we were kids. The kind we used in dodge ball that couldn't really hurt anyone but could bounce really well. Well, the ball got away from him and hit her car, and the alarm went off. She stormed out of her apartment, slammed her door behind here and knocked every picture off my wall breaking several frames. She then proceeded to storm back into her apartment and slammed the door again. That was when I got mad.

I got up, went down stairs and looked at the neighbor boy. I noticed that I was standing right in front of her window and it was open. I looked at the neighbor boy, raised my voice and said to him, "stop pissing her off! The psycho just slammed that damn door and knocked all my pictures off the wall and broke the glass in the frames." Then I winked at him. He wasn't the problem, and I wasn't mad at him, but I wanted her to hear what she had done. He smiled back and said "ok", and went over to the school to play. I went back upstairs.

Things were pretty quiet for a while. Things have been quiet. Well, except when her son screams for hours on end (he is at least three), at least once a week. He never smiles either. Ever. I ignore all of this though. Kids scream, and they cry and they do not care what hour of the day or night it is, and there is no rule that they should smile (but when they don't it does makes me wonder).

I guess there is also the dog she has that bothers me at well, and disrupts the peace. The downstairs apartments have small back yards, so she is allowed to have a dog. This has not been a problem with my past neighbors. Their dogs have all been great. Yeah, they all howl at sirens and bark when people get too close to the apartments, but none of that bothers me. The dog she has is a problem. This dog barks incessantly. All day, and all night at half hour increments unless it is in the apartment with her. It is never in the apartment with her. I am a heavy sleeper and this dog has woke me up from a dead sleep. Not only that, but I swear this dog has a split personality. You know how a person with split personalities can have an entirely different yet believable voice from one of the other personalities? Well, this dog fights with itself at night, and it sounds like there are two completely different dogs in that yard and in a fight! (If it isn't when I am trying to sleep it is comical.) I am sure you have realized this, but I am at my wits end with the dog, and have been for some time. I have thus far overlooked the dog and not complained or mentioned it. I haven't said anything to her, and I haven't called the land lady about it. I guess I have just chalked it up to apartment living.

There is more to this saga. A week ago today, we got my son a new twin mattress for his bed. He needed one badly. We took the old one down and placed it in the trash enclosure which has a seven foot privacy fence around it. You can't see into it unless you enter the enclosure or have an upstairs apartment with a window over looking it. I am the only one with and upstairs apartment with a window over looking it. My kitchen window to be exact. We put the mattress against the far wall of the enclosure, on its side, so that it didn't show at all, unless you were in the enclosure.

Well, guess what? This bothered her. She said something the day we put it there, and claimed that the garbage men wouldn't take it. I explained that in the last four years I have lived here the garbage men always took that kind of stuff. They may only do so once a month, and I couldn't remember exactly how often, but they always took the bigger items. That seemed to be the end of that.

I was wrong. Today she stopped us in the parking lot as we were carrying groceries in. She said, "You know, that mattress is still there." I was going to ignore her, but changed my mind. I have been too quiet about too many other things in the past regarding her. I stopped, turned, and looked at her and said, "they have always taken that stuff in the past. Why is it bothering you so much?" She responded in a very snide tone, "It is ugly." With much effort, I calmly said, "Then stop standing in the trash enclosure and staring at it." She started to say something else, and by then I had started walking, and made it to the top of the stairs. I am very aggravated by this point and I yelled something to the effect of, "what a stupid thing to get mad about." We went inside. Once the door was closed I yelled at the top of my lungs, "I will move the damn mattress when you shut your stupid dog up!"

We are calling Waste Management on Monday to ask them specifically about the mattress. If they won't take it I will get the neighbor with a pick-up truck to take it to the dump for us. I am furious though. The woman has an "holier than thou" attitude and needs to be knocked down a few notches if you ask me. Neighbors like her, are why people like me, want to move to the middle of the Rocky Mountains, and not have any access to our home short of a helicopter. People like her, are the reason I loose faith in humanity one person at a time, and why so many other people have to be medicated.

I wonder if I can nominate her for Sarge Charlie's Yellow Bellied Sapsucker of the Week Award...