Yesterday's Answer: Steve Prefontaine
Today's Quote:
"It is the province of knowledge to speak and it is the privilege of wisdom to listen"
Submissions are welcome, but it means you can't guess on the quote you submitted. If you have a submission, please email it to mrsxoke@gmail.com. Be sure to include your name as you wish it to appear with your submission, a link to your web page or blog, and the name of the person who said or wrote your quote.
Yesterday's Answer: Abraham Hicks
Today's Quote:
"To give anything less than your best is to sacrifice the gift."
Submissions are welcome, but it means you can't guess on the quote you submitted. If you have a submission, please email it to mrsxoke@gmail.com. Be sure to include your name as you wish it to appear with your submission, a link to your web page or blog, and the name of the person who said or wrote your quote.
Did you ever wonder why there are no dead penguins on the ice in Antarctica - where do they go when they die?
Wonder no more!!!
It is a known fact that the penguin is a very ritualistic bird which lives an extremely ordered and complex life. The penguin is very committed to its family and will mate for life, as well as maintaining a form of compassionate contact with its offspring throughout its life.
If a penguin is found dead on the ice surface, other members of the family and social circle have been known to dig holes in the ice, using their vestigial wings and beaks, until the hole is deep enough for the dead bird to be rolled into and buried.
The male penguins then gather in a circle around the fresh grave and sing:
Freeze a jolly good fellow,
Freeze a jolly good fellow.
Then they kick him in the ice hole.
Had you going, didn't I?
I will probably offend everyone of you at least once, although I never intend to. Please take these for what they are. They are jokes. The world needs a bit more laughter.
I would love to hear your jokes as well. Feel free to email them to me, or leave them in the comments below. If I feature yours, I will ask for your website, so I can link back to you. :)
Yesterday's Answer: Duke Ellington
Today's Quote:
"Everything springs forth from the imagination. Everything."
Submissions are welcome, but it means you can't guess on the quote you submitted. If you have a submission, please email it to mrsxoke@gmail.com. Be sure to include your name as you wish it to appear with your submission, a link to your web page or blog, and the name of the person who said or wrote your quote.
This Weeks Post Was Suggested by Michael
Yesterday's Answer: Zig Ziglar
Today's Quote:
"A problem is a chance for you to do your best."
Submissions are welcome, but it means you can't guess on the quote you submitted. If you have a submission, please email it to mrsxoke@gmail.com. Be sure to include your name as you wish it to appear with your submission, a link to your web page or blog, and the name of the person who said or wrote your quote.
Yesterday's Answer: Les Brown
Today's Quote:
"Success and happiness are not matters of chance but choice."
Submissions are welcome, but it means you can't guess on the quote you submitted. If you have a submission, please email it to mrsxoke@gmail.com. Be sure to include your name as you wish it to appear with your submission, a link to your web page or blog, and the name of the person who said or wrote your quote.
Yesterday's Answer: Demosthenes
Today's Quote:
"Shoot for the moon. Even if you miss, you'll land among the stars."
Submissions are welcome, but it means you can't guess on the quote you submitted. If you have a submission, please email it to mrsxoke@gmail.com. Be sure to include your name as you wish it to appear with your submission, a link to your web page or blog, and the name of the person who said or wrote your quote.
Yesterday's Answer: Scott Adams
Today's Quote:
"Small opportunities are often the beginning of great enterprises."
Submissions are welcome, but it means you can't guess on the quote you submitted. If you have a submission, please email it to mrsxoke@gmail.com. Be sure to include your name as you wish it to appear with your submission, a link to your web page or blog, and the name of the person who said or wrote your quote.
Yesterday's Answer: Calvin Coolidge
Today's Quote:
"Creativity is allowing yourself to make mistakes. Art is knowing which ones to keep."
Submissions are welcome, but it means you can't guess on the quote you submitted. If you have a submission, please email it to mrsxoke@gmail.com. Be sure to include your name as you wish it to appear with your submission, a link to your web page or blog, and the name of the person who said or wrote your quote.
Yesterday's Answer: Golda Meir
Today's Quote:
"It is much more important to kill bad bills than to pass good ones."
Submissions are welcome, but it means you can't guess on the quote you submitted. If you have a submission, please email it to mrsxoke@gmail.com. Be sure to include your name as you wish it to appear with your submission, a link to your web page or blog, and the name of the person who said or wrote your quote.
It is near the end of the school year. The teacher has turned in her
grades. There is really nothing to do. All the kids are restless because
there is nothing to do and it is near the end of the day.
The teacher says, "Whoever answers the questions I ask first and
correctly can leave early today." Little Johnny says to himself, "Good, I want to get outta here. I'm smart and will answer the question".
The teacher asked, "Who said 'Four Score and Seven Years Ago'?" Before Johnny could open his mouth, Susie said, "Abraham Lincoln". The teacher said, "That's right Susie. You can go". Johnny was MAD. Susie answered first.
The teacher asked, "Who said, 'I Have a Dream'?" Before Johnny could open his mouth, Mary said, "Martin Luther King". The teacher said, "That's right Mary. You can go". Johnny was even MADDER than before. Mary answered first.
The teacher asked, "Who said 'Ask not, what your country can do for
you'?" Before Johnny could open his mouth, Nancy said, "John Kennedy". The teacher said, "That's right Nancy . You can go". Johnny was BOILING MAD. Nancy answered first.
Then the teacher turned her back, and Johnny said, "I wish these bitches would keep their mouths shut".
The teacher asked, "WHO SAID THAT?"
Johnny said, "TIGER WOODS! CAN I GO NOW?"
I will probably offend everyone of you at least once, although I never intend to. Please take these for what they are. They are jokes. The world needs a bit more laughter.
I would love to hear your jokes as well. Feel free to email them to me, or leave them in the comments below. If I feature yours, I will ask for your website, so I can link back to you. :)
Yesterday's Answer: Arthur Schopenhauer
Today's Quote:
"One cannot and must not try to erase the past merely because it does not fit the present."
Submissions are welcome, but it means you can't guess on the quote you submitted. If you have a submission, please email it to mrsxoke@gmail.com. Be sure to include your name as you wish it to appear with your submission, a link to your web page or blog, and the name of the person who said or wrote your quote.
Yesterday's Answer: Bell Hooks
Today's Quote:
"Talent hits a target no one else can hit; Genius hits a target no one else can see."
Submissions are welcome, but it means you can't guess on the quote you submitted. If you have a submission, please email it to mrsxoke@gmail.com. Be sure to include your name as you wish it to appear with your submission, a link to your web page or blog, and the name of the person who said or wrote your quote.
Yesterday's Answer: Caroline Myss
Today's Quote:
"If you're attached to being a victim, there is no hope."
Submissions are welcome, but it means you can't guess on the quote you submitted. If you have a submission, please email it to mrsxoke@gmail.com. Be sure to include your name as you wish it to appear with your submission, a link to your web page or blog, and the name of the person who said or wrote your quote.
Yesterday's Answer: Carl Bard
Today's Quote:
"You can get bitter or you can get better. The choice is yours."
Submissions are welcome, but it means you can't guess on the quote you submitted. If you have a submission, please email it to mrsxoke@gmail.com. Be sure to include your name as you wish it to appear with your submission, a link to your web page or blog, and the name of the person who said or wrote your quote.
Yesterday's Answer: Jan Glidewell
Today's Quote:
"Though no one can go back and make a brand new start my friend, anyone can start from now and make a brand new end."
Submissions are welcome, but it means you can't guess on the quote you submitted. If you have a submission, please email it to mrsxoke@gmail.com. Be sure to include your name as you wish it to appear with your submission, a link to your web page or blog, and the name of the person who said or wrote your quote.
Yesterday's Answer: Edward Abbey
Today's Quote:
"You can clutch the past so tightly to your chest that it leaves your arms too full to embrace the present."
Submissions are welcome, but it means you can't guess on the quote you submitted. If you have a submission, please email it to mrsxoke@gmail.com. Be sure to include your name as you wish it to appear with your submission, a link to your web page or blog, and the name of the person who said or wrote your quote.
Yesterday's Answer: Zig Ziglar
Today's Quote:
"Better a cruel truth than a comfortable delusion."
Submissions are welcome, but it means you can't guess on the quote you submitted. If you have a submission, please email it to mrsxoke@gmail.com. Be sure to include your name as you wish it to appear with your submission, a link to your web page or blog, and the name of the person who said or wrote your quote.
I will probably offend everyone of you at least once, although I never intend to. Please take these for what they are. They are jokes. The world needs a bit more laughter.
I would love to hear your jokes as well. Feel free to email them to me, or leave them in the comments below. If I feature yours, I will ask for your website, so I can link back to you. :)
Yesterday's Answer: Will Rogers
Today's Quote:
"Failure is an event, not a person."
Submissions are welcome, but it means you can't guess on the quote you submitted. If you have a submission, please email it to mrsxoke@gmail.com. Be sure to include your name as you wish it to appear with your submission, a link to your web page or blog, and the name of the person who said or wrote your quote.
Yesterday's Answer: Bell Hooks
Today's Quote:
"I don't make jokes. I just watch the government and report the facts."
Submissions are welcome, but it means you can't guess on the quote you submitted. If you have a submission, please email it to mrsxoke@gmail.com. Be sure to include your name as you wish it to appear with your submission, a link to your web page or blog, and the name of the person who said or wrote your quote.
Yesterday's Answer: John F. Kennedy
Today's Quote:
"We have it in our power to begin the world over again."
Submissions are welcome, but it means you can't guess on the quote you submitted. If you have a submission, please email it to mrsxoke@gmail.com. Be sure to include your name as you wish it to appear with your submission, a link to your web page or blog, and the name of the person who said or wrote your quote.
Yesterday's Answer: Eleanor Roosevelt
Today's Quote:
"If you're attached to being a victim, there is no hope."
Submissions are welcome, but it means you can't guess on the quote you submitted. If you have a submission, please email it to mrsxoke@gmail.com. Be sure to include your name as you wish it to appear with your submission, a link to your web page or blog, and the name of the person who said or wrote your quote.
Yesterday's Answer: Lao Tzu
Today's Quote:
"It is not fair to ask of others what you are not willing to do yourself."
Submissions are welcome, but it means you can't guess on the quote you submitted. If you have a submission, please email it to mrsxoke@gmail.com. Be sure to include your name as you wish it to appear with your submission, a link to your web page or blog, and the name of the person who said or wrote your quote.
Yesterday's Answer: Millicent Fenwick
Today's Quote:
"Wise men don't need to prove their point.. men who need to prove their point aren't wise."
Submissions are welcome, but it means you can't guess on the quote you submitted. If you have a submission, please email it to mrsxoke@gmail.com. Be sure to include your name as you wish it to appear with your submission, a link to your web page or blog, and the name of the person who said or wrote your quote.
Yesterday's Answer: Ralph Waldo Emerson
Today's Quote:
"We must have government, but we must watch them like a hawk."
Submissions are welcome, but it means you can't guess on the quote you submitted. If you have a submission, please email it to mrsxoke@gmail.com. Be sure to include your name as you wish it to appear with your submission, a link to your web page or blog, and the name of the person who said or wrote your quote.
Yesterday's Answer: Emily Dickinson
Today's Quote:
"Fear defeats more people than any other one thing in the world."
Submissions are welcome, but it means you can't guess on the quote you submitted. If you have a submission, please email it to mrsxoke@gmail.com. Be sure to include your name as you wish it to appear with your submission, a link to your web page or blog, and the name of the person who said or wrote your quote.
Simple is sometimes best...
Curious, John asks his friend Sam "Why do scuba divers always fall backwards off their boats?"
To which Sam replies, "Well, if they fell forward they'd still be in the damn boat!"
I will probably offend everyone of you at least once, although I never intend to. Please take these for what they are. They are jokes. The world needs a bit more laughter.
I would love to hear your jokes as well. Feel free to email them to me, or leave them in the comments below. If I feature yours, I will ask for your website, so I can link back to you. :)
Yesterday's Answer: Jimi Hendrix
Today's Quote:
"Forever is composed of nows."
Submissions are welcome, but it means you can't guess on the quote you submitted. If you have a submission, please email it to mrsxoke@gmail.com. Be sure to include your name as you wish it to appear with your submission, a link to your web page or blog, and the name of the person who said or wrote your quote.
This Weeks Post Was Suggested By Cindy
Yesterday's Answer: Lao Tzu
Today's Quote:
"Knowledge speaks, but wisdom listens."
Submissions are welcome, but it means you can't guess on the quote you submitted. If you have a submission, please email it to mrsxoke@gmail.com. Be sure to include your name as you wish it to appear with your submission, a link to your web page or blog, and the name of the person who said or wrote your quote.
Yesterday's Answer: Ayn Rand
Today's Quote:
"Being deeply loved by someone gives you strength, while loving someone deeply gives you courage"
Submissions are welcome, but it means you can't guess on the quote you submitted. If you have a submission, please email it to mrsxoke@gmail.com. Be sure to include your name as you wish it to appear with your submission, a link to your web page or blog, and the name of the person who said or wrote your quote.
Yesterday's Answer: Arthur Ashe
Today's Quote:
"Govt was set to protect man from criminals-and the Constitution was written to protect man from the government."
Submissions are welcome, but it means you can't guess on the quote you submitted. If you have a submission, please email it to mrsxoke@gmail.com. Be sure to include your name as you wish it to appear with your submission, a link to your web page or blog, and the name of the person who said or wrote your quote.
Yesterday's Answer: Bill Gates
Today's Quote:
"Success is a journey, not a destination. The doing is often more important than the outcome."
Submissions are welcome, but it means you can't guess on the quote you submitted. If you have a submission, please email it to mrsxoke@gmail.com. Be sure to include your name as you wish it to appear with your submission, a link to your web page or blog, and the name of the person who said or wrote your quote.
Yesterday's Answer: Will Rogers
Today's Quote:
"Success is a lousy teacher. It seduces smart people into thinking they can't lose."
Submissions are welcome, but it means you can't guess on the quote you submitted. If you have a submission, please email it to mrsxoke@gmail.com. Be sure to include your name as you wish it to appear with your submission, a link to your web page or blog, and the name of the person who said or wrote your quote.
Yesterday's Answer: Barry Goldwater
Today's Quote:
"Nations are like a lot of women with their babies. Each thinks that theirs is the best."
Submissions are welcome, but it means you can't guess on the quote you submitted. If you have a submission, please email it to mrsxoke@gmail.com. Be sure to include your name as you wish it to appear with your submission, a link to your web page or blog, and the name of the person who said or wrote your quote.
A first grade girl handed in the drawing below for a homework assignment...
After it was graded and the child brought it home, she returned to school the next day with the following note:
Dear Ms. Davis,
I want to be very clear on my child's illustration. It is NOT of me on a dance pole on a stage in a strip joint. I work at Home Depot and had commented to my daughter how much money we made in the recent snowstorm. This drawing is of me selling a shovel.
Mrs. Harrington
I will probably offend everyone of you at least once, although I never intend to. Please take these for what they are. They are jokes. The world needs a bit more laughter.
I would love to hear your jokes as well. Feel free to email them to me, or leave them in the comments below. If I feature yours, I will ask for your website, so I can link back to you. :)
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