The Best of Craig's List

I was wandering the internet tonight and stumbled across The Best of Craig's List. I looked up the listing for my area and was touched by one listing, and rolling in laughter at the others. I had to share.

This is the post that really touched me. The one that reminded me why I live in this little area of the world. This is a p-art of the country where people care and help one another. Where most people harbor no stereotypes or prejudices. It is also a part of the world where people say thank you, and mean it. Please read the below:

Date: 2008-07-07, 10:59PM PDT

Ok, so people often ask, where are the good kind people anymore?

Driving on Mt.Rose Hwy, and serving our communties is where! So I'm coming home to Reno on my motorcycle Saturday Evening after a short ride up to the top and back down cuz it was too smokey up there, somewhere around 8pm I think? Anyways... Near the bottom, I hit some oil, gravel, not sure what... but even as an experienced rider for some 30+ years, made my bike wobble so bad, I eventually lost control after doing everything I could try to do to keep it up. From what I hear, might have even hit a guard rail at some point during the crash, no memory so not sure, all I do know is next thing I'm on the pavement in a ton of pain. Rolling in the road I think...

Stranger #1 -
Then, there was a hand... holding mine, comforting me thru my gloves... Kept hearing a voice that I think was female telling me "everything was gonna be ok" and "help is on the way". Couldn't really open my eyes much, that's why I'm not sure if it was male or female, but it didn't really matter at that point, ya know? I just know 'till the day I die, I will forever remember how comforting it felt to know that "if" I was gonna die then, someone was gonna be holding my hand while it happened and I would not die alone on some road tasting asphalt.

You have no idea what that meant to me, still does, and always will. You probably also have no idea how much gratitude I would like to express to you for the comfort you gave me, a complete stranger, when I really, REALLY needed it. I just remember your hand, rubbing mine and your soft, kind, compassionate words letting me know, someone cared. You didn't just drive by, you took time out of your Holiday weekend to help me - some fat ass biker guy that some here on CL wish we would all crash and die.

Stranger #2
No clue who this was either, but someone called police/ambulance, etc. super quick and there they were, hot on the spot within minutes. (felt like minutes to me anyways, damn quick!), can't thank you enough and damn glad ya had signal...hahaha!

Stranger #3
Again, same as the others, no idea who you were, but I heard someone else say something I think about removing my helmet. In my mind I was thinking please, please don't do that, but I couldn't say it. But you could and did, you spoke up and advised against it. Damn I am glad there are people like you who know better and again, my sincere appreciation and grattitude to you as well.

Strangers #4, 5, 6, 7, 8, etc..
To all the police firemen/women, ambulance drivers, person in the back of the ambulance.. to all of you emergency responder type people who showed up who did whatever it was you had been trained to do, and loaded me on some kind of back board or something I think, and then put my big ol' self in the ambulance and got me to Renown so quickly - my most humble thanks and appreciation as well. I know you were "just doing your jobs", but damn you do them well! You will NEVER hear me bitch about your pay raises or what it costs for the absolute QUALITY services you provide our community! I do know of one policeman or hwy patrolmen who I think arranged to have my bike towed and visited me in the ER letting me know it's condition and where it had been towed to, cuz he put his badge number on my insurance paper, as I get better in the next few days I would like to find you and thank you in person since I have a clue on maybe how to find you from the badge #. You also gathered my personal belongings I had on the bike that would have been stolen for sure. (cam corder, etc..) Yes, I know, small things to worry about in that moment, but you made sure I didn't have to, again, thank you for going out of your way for my needs.

To all the Dr.s, Nurses, and whoever else was working in that ER room, my eternal thanks and grattitude as well. Man I was hurting, them ribs are a bitch when smashed, but you folks all again, did what you were trained to do in the finest proffesional manner (even on the embarssing stuff) and I just knew from all your demeanors, I was gonna be ok.

I am sure there are some typos and mis-spellings in this post, forgive me as i am on some pretty strong pills for pain, but i just got to my computer and wanted to get these thank yous out as soon as possible. All of you people just really have no clue what your kindness and compassion meant, and means to me even now.I would like to let you all know, that from your kindess, skills and so on... I'm going to be ok. Could have been a lot worse, but thanks to good people like you, a damn fine helmet and a little luck, both I and the bike are fixable.

If there is any chance of any of you "unknowns" letting me know who you are, I would greatly like to thank you all in person, if that's not your style, I respect that and just know you meant alot to one hurting, scared guy, yeah... I was scared I'll admitt to it no problem!

Last and not forgotten in any way, once I was admitted to the 3rd floor, all the Nurses, CNA's, Orderlies, people waking me up every few hours to check my vitals and stuff, I also sincerely thank you, but since I know how to re-find you all, i will be seeing you again in person to thank you properly, especially Melissa, a nurse or CNA not sure, but one awesome lady I did not have enough time to thank properly today as I left! I really wish I could have stayed and healed longer as today really ended up hurting, but you know why I had to leave. You friggin ROCK!

Sincerely,
Tim H.

Now, for the lighter side of life. I saved them to help lighten the mood and keep the tears at bay. The next three are funny, and have some questionable language at times. I have not edited them in anyway. Read at your own risk.

#1:

Date: 2009-08-25, 3:06PM PDT

I was floating down the river on my tube, and Pancakes was right next to me. He is a small, 13 legged centipede who loves taco sauce, hardy partying, and never forgets to take his gummy vitamins. I looked back and he was gone, floating away. . . SCREAMING. No one knew what to do. He is a very good floater, probably because of all the gummi vitamins he takes. He never eats McDonalds when I do either. If you find him could you please e-mail me immediately!?? I miss him so much and I have no one to talk to, and no one to drink beerz with. He was my only friend. He was supposed to be 12 this upcoming Feb. 9th. He is an Aquarius.

Ps. He Has A SMILE as BRIGHT as the SUNNNNNNNNN :-)

<3

#2

Date: 2008-02-12, 12:53PM PST

Dear Roommates,

We live a wonderful life here in our little house in Tahoe. The location is great, the weather is wonderful, our neighbors rock. I realize that of the three of us, I am the only one in a comitted relationship, and I am fine with that. I will be moving out in the next few months, and you will have to find a third roommate. Before this happens, however, I wanted to make a suggestion that will make the new roommate's life a little easier.

Stop picking up hitchhikers, bringing them home, and fucking them all over the house.

Yeah, I know, kind of a petty demand. After all, you can't drive through town without seeing some hot little South American girl with her thumb out. And Tahoe is kind of lacking in the female department, so I see where you're coming from. But really, do you have to bring every girl you pick up home and have loud, house shaking sex with them? I admit you've both got it down to a science: Pick up hot Brazillian chick, show off the 10 words of Portugese you've learned, somehow coerce them into coming over and having sex with you, then drive them home and hope to never pick them up again. I admit, it's a pretty sweet life.

At first it was mildly entertaining to see what walked in the door. But after 3 month of constant porno sounds eminating from all corners of the house, it is starting to get on my nerves. I think what pushed me over the edge was the day I came home and found you two tag teaming some foreign chick in the living room, giving each other high fives over the top of her. I live in fear of bringing any of my friends over without doing some recon first. I should not have to call my house and ask if you're balls deep in some girls ass or if the coast is clear. None of this was disclosed when I signed the lease.

So please, I beg you to reconsider your actions for the sake of whomever replaces me. It's like living in a bad porno.

Sincerely,
Your Roommate

ps. The next time you ask me to borrow a condom because you're out, there will be a $30 charge per rubber. It's the least you can do.

#3

Date: 2007-07-10, 8:41PM PDT


Dear Craig,

I think we need to talk about our relationship. You�ve been a good friend to me in the past � we have shared some fun, some laughs, some deals. But Craig, I need to talk to you about the kind of guys you try to hook me up with.

I understand that finding two compatible souls is hard work. I respect your efforts, I really do. However, I think there is a fundamental flaw in your overall approach, Craig. Lets look at some examples:

In the past, I said I liked guys who are athletic and outgoing; you sent me boys who consider video games a sport and think that meeting new gamers in World of Warcraft is social.

I thought that my placing an ad in the W4M made it obvious that I was interested in single men. Considering that 80% who replied were married, I can only assume I didn�t make it obvious enough. Touch�, Craig. Touch�.

I indicated that I prefer tattoos, piercings and some flexibility in the 9 to 5 zone, and what do I get from you, Craig? I get insurance salesmen, accountants and computer programmers. I hope you are ashamed of yourself.

I said that I have a great sense of humor, am a smart ass and love watching South Park, Family Guy and Mythbusters; you sent me a man thinks Emeril and the cooking channel are what all humor is derived from and another who watches the 700 Club. The 700 Club, Craig!!! With that you met and exceeded my already low expectations.

I also mentioned I prefer guys a few years younger than me (preferably mid to late 20�s); seeing as the mean age of respondents was 45, I was apparently too subtle for you Craig. Either that or you sense in me an Oedipal Complex of which I am not yet aware.

Finally, I mentioned that I�m pretty independent, low-key, and relaxed type of girl. I�m busy � I own my own business, house, car, etc. When I�m not working, I like to have a good time, have fun, be spontaneous and enjoy life but am not looking to get married or have kids right now. Apparently you thought I would be a great match for forty-something guys trying to find a mother for their kids or a baby-making machine themselves � or someone to cook and clean for them � or a permanent or temporary sex toy. As I have mentioned before, Craig, I do not come as a sex only package. My vagina is not up for auction

Craig: it has become obvious to me that you believe that extreme opposites attract. I see your game, and I raise you. Craig: please find me a short, bald, uninteresting, middle aged man with no sense of humor and a small penis who loves Classical Music and hanging out at home with his kids and cat.

I hope the first gave you pause and made you think. I hope it made you remember that even the smallest gesture, like holding a person's hand, can mean the world. I hope the last three gave you a giggle, and reminded you that you aren't alone in your struggles to grasp sanity. Or perhaps the helped you remember that maybe things aren't as bad for you as you had previously thought?